When my mom started showing signs of more and more forgetfulness, more physical needs, medication management needs, the decision was made to move to assisted living. Each family’s different, so you have to look at physical needs and cognitive needs, memory needs, decision-making needs. Alzheimer’s is a disease that is pretty subtle and it’s easy not to want to look at it. People who suffer from Alzheimer’s are pretty good about covering it up. They can’t remember what they had to eat yesterday, but they can have an answer for you. I can walk around the facility here and say, “Lucy, how was breakfast?” And she’ll say, “Well, I can’t remember if I ate, but I’m sure it was good.” I mean, they answer  right, so they present very well. 

She’ll say, “Well, I can’t remember if I ate, but I’m sure it was good.” 

Subtle signs of needs

• Bathing becomes an issue; your mother was so fastidious before, and her clothing is now soiled.
• Musty odor, refrigerator not clean, too full, too empty.
• Silverware sticky, not really clean.
• In the house are there letters and bills left unopened? Are they receiving notices? 
• Are they repeating themselves when they talk to you? Not once, we all do that.
• Do you see a repeated change in behavior? If your mother always lost her glasses, it’s nothing new for her to lose her glasses at 80, 85. If she forgets she wears them, that might be a sign. 
• There are so many physical things that can cause confusion, they need to be evaluated. Could it be a thyroid problem? A bladder infection can really mimic depression, can mimic dementia.
• One of the signs that your parent needs help is when you find yourself needing/wanting to go to the doctor with them.           - Stella Henry

These comments were taken from original interviews for the Embracing Aging documentary and have been paraphrased slightly for readability.

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